On a site visit this summer a principal looked at me with an intense stare and said, "if there is one thing that worries me, it's the incoming kindergarten class. " He went on to explain how the contracted school psychologist had told him after discussing the intense needs of the incoming children that: "you know, schools are now the front line for mental health issues." This theme raised its head again last week. I learned of a program with a young child who runs away regularly and finding strategies to help is exceedingly difficult as the 'runner' time and again takes all the attention of the entire staff. And yesterday, another conversation led to a discussion about a young student who requires the deserved extra help, 1:1 and intensive planning he gets, but only for two days a week, as coming every day is just not best thing for him.
I go to a retirement party of a colleague and learn about the hotel down the street, where kids are living with no covers on bare mattresses and where large roaches control the night. "Did you see the picture in the paper of kids playing out in that parking lot in a puddle?" my colleague asks. "It breaks your heart."
I drive by that hotel every day after work. I did not know.
Young kids are being pushed very hard. From all directions. We have to be careful that afterschool is the right place for them. For many of the youngest, afterschool is a decent option, but I am concerned for the inevitable kindergarten kid who is being a good sport even at the end of the day: following along, but is truly too tired, too spent, maybe too stressed, too young to be fully engaged at 4.45.
What should we do? Look out for the signs. See if there is body language showing a child that has mentally shut down. Be careful of asking too much of them. Be aware when they turn off. Offer them space and quiet and peace and rest; drink and food and love. A helping ear, a hand if need be, but maybe less, not more...is needed.
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